The River Runs Deep

Angelic Hosts at Work

Facebook is doing it's job to monitor spammers and fake news. The Creator of the Universe monitors the physical drive by's, division makers and those with misguided agenda, etc in the spirit realm that manifests daily. If you come by my space take note of the angelic hosts at work 😉

I like this image because it shows the angelic battle going on with the powers of darkness while I stay at peace!

-Cindy-

#AngelicHosts #Warfare #StayingPeaceful #Saturday

He Prepares a Table Before Me as My Enemies Watch

When circumstances unfold and challenges come I'm reminded that the Lord prepares a table before me as my enemies watch.

Remember when circumstances appear there is a Greater One who lives in us.

And 'no weapon formed against us will prosper'

Ps 23:5
Is.54:17

-Cindy-

We're Made to Thrive Not Survive

Good afternoon and Happy First Day of Summer!

I stumbled across one of Casting Crowns songs, "Thrive" that just really boosted my afternoon.

I have a group called 'Thrive Not Survive' yet the Creator of the Universe is the core of all I do.

No matter your passions or what you do for a living, let the Lord--the Creator of the Universe be at the core!
Now go have a Thriving weekend!
-Cindy-

#ThriveNotSurvive #CastingCrowns

The Warrior is a Child

Happy Monday to all of you!
How was your weekend and Father's Day?
My dad's been gone for awhile. I sure miss him.
Makes one value our loved ones while their with us.
As a young girl many times in circumstances happening I felt like Father God was all I had. Because of my relationship with Him at a very young age, and my dad's love for me in spite of his alcoholism, I just always felt like I had hope to hang on to.

Usually this blog is where I share bit more about me where it wouldn't be appropriate on my business blogs.
So I'm eating my homemade chili and sharing what's been on my mind the past few days.
Facebook is so fickle and makes people so at times as well. To share and expect a heartfelt response on my personal facebook is seldom going to happen.
Part of the problem is we all live our lives and attention span so fast one has to be outrageously witty to get anyone's attention. I'm working on that outrageous and witty but I haven't arrived. Besides the fact if people don't care enough to interact is it really worth the effort!

I am intentionally slowing down to appreciate what's important. Since I'm having to work full time for a bit, some things just don't get done but what is important.
I hate working outside of my passion with my business but it's necessary for right now.

I didn't ask for some things in life like a husband who is narcissistic and a child molester but it sure has turned my world upside down.
It's been a year and 2 months since he's been gone and still I experience so much aftermath although I'm doing alright as I go through things.
Little things come up that I have to deal with.
Last week I encountered a person that genuinely used to seem to care at the church I was involved in and yesterday saw a person's fb page from the same church who told me their not on facebook anymore has posted on their page regularly and doesn't accept my friend request. It brings up that can of worms that the besides one person no one from that church family reaches out or shows any support.
I could ponder in my head and heart till Jesus comes that I'm blamed for the unspeakable my soon to be ex did to my grand daughter and took the churches worship leader away or they believe he's innocent and I'm the idiot. (a normalcy for narcissists to set up)
Reality is just because people know Jesus doesn't mean they have arrived or listen to the Holy Spirit beyond what benefits them. It's been a hard pill to swallow that the last church I would consider going to has no more depth than my neighbor next door. (No one lives next door lol)
I do ask the Lord, "what has happened to people really loving God and others beyond words?"

Regardless, I'm still that little girl that walks and talks with Jesus. I'm still the warrior that is a child and crawls up in the safe arms of my Father God!

God still loves all those who are steeped in religiosity and lack of real concern beyond their benefit. He still draws them and He still is healing my broken heart.
Ok enough of all this for now. Thanks for reading.
Love ya
-Cindy-

Let it Be a Day of Overwhelming Peace

Make a decision today, tomorrow and the days to come to overcome in the power, love and the sound mind you've been blessed with!
"The worst sorrows in life are not in its losses and misfortunes, but its fears." -- Arthur Christopher Benson

Blessings in Disguise

I hope you've had a good Friday so far.

Mine was a bit rough but I'm overcoming.

I procured a job that was my passion--working with rescue animals as I work toward having my own rescue.

A lot of things went wrong and kept going wrong.

I've been aware for sometime that some animal rescues are hell bent on bad mouthing and destroying other rescues vs working together to save animals.

I have been totally taken off guard that destruction can come within toward those who work to re-home animals.

I so wish others had courage to draw boundaries and be courageous to stand against such onslaughts in the very profession we are passionate about. If it were the case it might help the person(s) who have things so wrong in their lives that they harm others in word and deed. Maybe they'd get help and let go of a business opportunity they mask as something their impassioned about.

I understand the cost of taking such a stand and drawing a line. It can cause one to lose their job. I know first hand.
I was let go of today since I wouldn't grovel to the floor for the owner.

Tomorrow I'll go say good bye to those fur babies I'm going to miss and my heart is heavy. I have lots of tears flowing over my loss of them.
I'll overcome and I'm looking at what I've learned and gained.

I gained the companionship of a wonderful rescue, Marie who I love very much!

I've learned when I have my own rescue how I want to treat those who work with me and the kind of people I want to work with me. These are all big in my eyes!

So I go forward with my gains and overcoming my losses and sadness.
Tomorrow is a new day!

Have a great weekend and go for all the gusto you can. Life is too short to miss out on the blessings even if they might be in disguise at first.
Cindy

Resting Place

#ARestingPlace

Saying Goodbye Too Soon

Tristan Alexander Holmes

Born: January 30, 1987

Died:

March 28, 2018

I'm sharing this for my friend, Faith who just lost her brother, Tristan to suicide.
He battled against PTSD after several tours in Iraq and Afghanistan, as a mine sweeper.
Tristan chose to take his own life on March 27, 2018.

In Faith's own words, "Don’t let this all be in vain. Don’t let Tristan’s passing be for nothing. If you are suffering, whether from PTSD or any other condition, please reach out. Text a friend. Email a family member. Find a support group on Facebook. Call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-8255. Go to an Emergency Room. There are people that love you and care about you and are willing to help".

Tristan Alexander Holmes was a son and a grandson. A brother and an uncle. A nephew and a cousin. A friend and a Marine. He was funny, and he had perfect comedic timing. He was smart, and he was constantly asking questions to learn whatever he could. When he decided on a course of action, he didn’t waver from it. He was so many things to so many people. He was a good man.

Born January 30, 1987 at the Air Force Academy in Colorado Springs, CO, he was 100% boy. He was rough and tumble, loved to climb trees and hike, and loved running around and playing outside. His nickname was “Bear” and it was always appropriate: when he was a toddler and his shirts didn’t quite cover his little round belly; when he played middle linebacker and every other team in his league was afraid to play his team; and when his two older sisters started dating.

He moved to Texas with his family in 1993 and picked up the state religion: football. He flouted tradition and became a fan of the Indianapolis Colts, much to the dismay of his Dallas Cowboys loving sisters. He played in the Peewee league, then middle school, and eventually in high school.

He decided while in high school that he wanted to be a Marine. This led to him joining ROTC at Stony Point High School in Round Rock, Texas. He graduated in May of 2005. And because he had set his mind to it and didn’t waver from that course of action, he enlisted in the Marine Corps on October 24, 2005.

He did several tours in Iraq and Afghanistan, as a mine sweeper with the 31st Marine Expeditionary Unit. He saw things that no 19 or 20-year-old should have to see, and experienced things that most of us don’t even see in our nightmares. Yet he did it until the day he was discharged, on January 30, 2009.

After discharge, he did what he could to make ends meet, while also suffering from severe PTSD as a result of his service in the Marine Corps. Like many Vets returning from war, he had trouble holding down a job and functioning in society. Sadly, this means he turned to drugs and alcohol as a means of coping with all that he had seen and been through. And like too many Vets, he had trouble getting the help he really needed from the VA. While living in Denver, CO, he was finally officially diagnosed with PTSD in 2016.

He eventually made his way out to Fresno, CA. But because of his addictions, he struggled still. He found his way to St. George Greek Orthodox Church, where Father Jim Pappas worked with him to get sober, find a place to live, get some job training, and find a job. He went to school to become an EMT and passed his EMT exam. He attended church at St. George where he served in the altar. He was attending meetings to keep himself sober and clean.

But the beast of PTSD was always looking over his shoulder. Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder is defined as a mental health condition that's triggered after experiencing a trauma or life-threatening event. The symptoms include flashbacks, nightmares, severe anxiety, depression and confusion. And Tristan certainly experienced trauma and a life-threatening event, after seeing and experiencing what he did in the Middle East. That’s not something that you forget. That’s not something you just get over when you’re not Active Duty anymore. That’s not something that you can fight on your own.

He tried, though. Tristan tried to fight it, and he did, for a long time. There were many people that helped him when and where they could. But the real help that he needed, the help that could have possibly saved him, never came. He was fighting to get help from the Veterans Administration. He was fighting to get treatment for the PTSD that was caused by his service as a Marine. And still the help never came. And he was fighting too many other fights at the same time. A person can only fight so many things for so long before they feel that they just can’t fight anymore. Rather than keep fighting, Tristan tragically chose to take his own life on March 27, 2018.

Don’t let this all be in vain. Don’t let Tristan’s passing be for nothing. If you are suffering, whether from PTSD or any other condition, please reach out. Text a friend. Email a family member. Find a support group on Facebook. Call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-8255. Go to an Emergency Room. There are people that love you and care about you and are willing to help. Every single one of us looks back and thinks, “I wish I would have done more for Tristan.” We wonder if that Christmas or birthday card that we should have sent would have been the difference. We wonder if that phone call to check up on him would have been the difference. We wonder if that email to let him know we were thinking about him would have been the difference. We wonder if we should have visited him more often, and if that would have been the difference. What we do know for sure is that each and every one of us would gladly accept your email, text, or phone call, if it means we can help prevent another tragic death.

Tristan was a good man. He always had some deep philosophy to share, whether to cheer someone up, help them through a hard time, or share in their joy. He had a way of doing little things that had a great impact on those around him. There are at least two people in this world that he had such a profound impact on that they chose to name their own sons after Tristan.

Tristan is survived by his father, William S. “Sid” Holmes, of Silver Spring, Maryland; his mother Victoria Deyeaux and stepfather Michael Friends, of Round Rock, TX; his sister Faith St. Thomas, brother in law Anthony St. Thomas, and nephew Isaac St. Thomas, of Woodbridge, VA; his sister Ruth Christensen and brother in law Russ Christensen, of Springfield, VA; his grandmother Shirley Holmes, of Sunset Beach, NC; several aunts, uncles, and cousins; and so many friends that mourn his passing.

#Goodbye #suicide #PTSD #VeteransAdministration #NoHelp #Marines #Mourning

Saying Goodbye to America's Pastor in a World Gone Mad

Saying goodbye to 'America's Pastor'

Thank you Billy Graham for raising a standard that hasn't fallen for many of us.

In a world so anti-God because partly religion having perverted the Bible away from a message of grace & love. if one could look past the hate and look at the history of where we've come from, you'd find religion wasn't always perverted in the pendelum from grace to kiss arse to the OT laws no one can meet, resulting in a 'do what ya want attitude and how dare ya stop me'.

Do not misunderstand, I have for my Jewish heritage a respect beyond words as well as for the Torah.

I only say the perversion of a love of God has twisted

such awesomeness to look like garbage. It's hard to speak out because someone(s) has to start a war over where someone stands. Although those same ones will fight if you attack their stand. I'm going to continue to be a vessel of destiny, unity and hope. I'm beyond being moved by attack. So Billy Graham your legacy and the seeds planted lives on. Darkness always hates light and that I keep in front of me when I walk my life out.

When wealth is lost, nothing is lost; when health is lost, something is lost; when character is lost, all is lost.

How's Monday Looking For Ya?

Good Morning

How's Monday looking for ya?

It's a brisk autumn morning with wind so far about 25 mph.

It's brrr and not going to get over 43 F.

I don't care. I just bundle warm and have lots to do inside as I enjoy autumn.

And you know the dogs don't mind the cooler weather. Rusty and Dusty wear a winter coat all year round.

I'd love to hear your comments on Monday and Autumn!
Do you hate both or love both? Hate one or love one?

Aaaaah come on share with us.

Cindy

#autumn #Monday #Rusty #Dusty #LoveorHate

Carrie and Life We Remember You Always

Carrie a wonderful woman of faith, mom of 5 children, wife of Nick and loved by everyone was diagnosed with Glioblastoma cancer in her brain. Soon after her diagnosis discovered she was pregnant with her 6th child. She was approved for a trial for her cancer treatment but chose to decline to save her baby. Carrie was able to carry the baby girl, they named ''Life Lynn' to 24 weeks when it was decided for the baby she must be born. After a courageous battle and support of her husband, family and thousands on social media she left for heaven. Baby Life Lynn seemed to be improving but didn't make it. Her and Carrie are now in heaven together.

Nick and his children along with other family members are grieving and still could use your support.

Please stop over to the facebook page, 'Cure 4 Carrie' and show your support. Video below as well.

https://www.facebook.com/cure4carrie/

#CarrieDeklyen #LifeDeklyen #WeRemember

Are You Digging For Crumbs

This afternoon I write this for myself as well as anyone else it may benefit.

I've been reading Daily Meditation & Personal Journal
'My Soul Follows Hard After Thee'
God Chasers
By Tommy Tenney

I've been thinking about today's reading and the abundance God has for all of us.
I am not talking just spiritual nor just physical things like health and food. I'm talking about both.

I've been reflecting how I grew up with little to eat, remember being cold in the winter months due to not enough blankets for all of us and just living in chaos.

Mom made us go to church every Sunday and know she was trying her best for us.
I don't remember getting a lot out of mass or the CCD classes. How do you concentrate in the midst of hunger and chaos!
I do remember God was all I had all those years when I felt so alone & everyone around us in the community judged us for my dad's alcoholism and abuse of us.
I loved my family and I loved God. I was just so confused in the midst of it all.
I do have a big sister who watched over us kids until the chaos caused her to have to choose to leave.

I said all this to focus on God having an abundance to give us for every area of life.
Just because answers aren't always immediate and at times not even what we expected, doesn't mean God isn't at work.

So many throughout my years have tried to trade my real relationship with the Lord for religious rules and regulations.
I so want to keep telling others, " Don't you know when you love & have a meaningful and powerful relationship with someone,
you strive to do your best to be real and do right and it's not grievous to do so either.
In other words I don't have to jump through hoops to live a moral and right life before & with God. Nor do I need the whip of the law and rules to keep me in line!
To me that is all so absurd!

"There is much more of God available than we have ever known or imagined, but we have become satisfied with where we are and what we have so much that we don't press in for God's best. Yes, God is moving among us and working in our lives, but we have been content to comb the carpet for the crumbs as opposed to having the abundant loaves of hot bread God has prepared for us in the ovens of Heaven! He has prepared a great table of His presence in this day, and He is calling to the Church(me, you, us-not a building), "Come and dine."
(The God Chasers, 22)

There is a God who draws near to us and is here to comfort and give us what is needed.
For so many of us we had a church, a natural father or someone(s) who harmed us and caused us to run far from anything to do with God.
I ask you to not confuse any longer those people or those churches with who God is.

He is amazing through His Son, Yeshua or Jesus.
Draw near and He will draw near to you.
Cindy

#DrawNeartoHim #HotLoavesofBread #Heaven #RealLife
#NoHoops #NotLaw

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Homeschool + Recovery + a Narcissist & Autumn

I haven't posted for a bit.

Had more work done

on my mouth and

getting back into

our homeschool

routine.

My recovery has been a little slower than I preferred with the work on my mouth but I'm better everyday. Yayyy

I sure have slowed down and rested a lot more.

Some wish for those days to slow down and rest.

I think I should plan to do so regularly without surgery. lol

There's been someone in our lives that I strongly believe is a narcissist. When this individual is around every attempt to discredit us, control us and destroy anything positive in our lives is the battle.

I'm not sure of the day to day answers but I do know a God who promised to never leave me or forsake me: Therefore there will be direction and answers to resolve this.
In the meantime I'm learning a lot and hope to never be buffeted by such evil ever again.

A highlight right now is Autumn. I love the trees beginning to turn colors, the rain and thunderstorms.